Delving into the Depths of My Psyche

Do you know why I'm writing this blog post?

because I'm afraid to check my e-mail and this will take up more time before I actually have to get up my courage and just look. 


Yes, my friends, I suffer from What-Megan-Doesn't-Know-Won't-Kill-Her Syndrome, or WMDKWKHS for short.

It most often occurs when I send an important e-mail that usually deals with:
A) A prestigious study abroad programme
B) Internships
C) Sending papers to TAs/professors

This is usually the procedure*:

9:10 am--Write an e-mail to director/employer/TA/professor.

9:15 am--Revise e-mail to director/employer/TA/professor.

9:20 am--Proofread e-mail to director/employer/TA/professor.

9:25 am--Look over e-mail again. Take out cliche phrases.

9:30 am--Send e-mail to director/employer/TA/professor.

Now, WMDKWKHS usually doesn't manifest itself for at least an hour. If the director/employer/TA/professor e-mails back within an hour, there is no time for WMDKWKHS to take effect, because worry doesn't set in. But let's be honest. Worry's going to set in. It's me we're talking about, people.

9:30 am to 5:30 pm--Life. Mull over e-mail during the day, worry over possible replies:

A) NO! You are not allowed to come on this amazing once-in-a-lifetime opportunity! Now go to a corner and cry!

B) NO! We'd rather hire a monkey than you!

C) HAHAHAHAHAHA! This was the worst paper I've ever read in my life! And you call yourself an English major?!**

5:30 pm--Go to the computer and wonder if I should check e-mail. Decide against it. Could be bad news (see above). 

5:31 pm--Go on Facebook instead.

6:00 pm--I really probably should check my e-mail, just in case they've written back. That way I can deal with it . . .

7:00 pm--Really should check that e-mail . . .

7:15 pm--Let's watch all of the extended editions of the Lord of the Rings, instead. Yeah, that's a great idea.

6:45 am--Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz *Music in the background: "Grey ships pass into the west. . ."*

7:00 am--Wake up from a nightmare about orcs forcing me to eat computers with BBQ sauce.

7:01 am--Oh yeah . . . e-mail.

7:02 am--Go to computer.

7:03 am--Slowly type my username and password. Close my eyes, bracing myself to read the incriminating response from director/employer/TA/professor . . .

G-mail Inbox: You have 0 new messages.

Me: ARRRRGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

After that, the cycle continues indefinitely until I finally get a response.

And usually, it isn't bad. And if it is bad, I deal with it quickly and well.

It's just getting to the e-mail that's hard for me.

But here I go. I'm going to check that e-mail now.

Maybe.








*This is an exaggeration. Most of the time.
** Again, exaggeration. I don't really think anyone would write something like that. Unless they're sadists.